rotting root

it's 3 days away from my 30th bday...the 1 year anniversary of my book, little bird. i'm hoping to write book 2 on the morning of my bday just like i did last year. but no doubt, this is setting myself up for way too much pressure. so, today i decided to start this blog since all things online are the future! after all, i did meet the love of my life online. and the book is partly what made him fall in love with me. perhaps it's my anti-social (or elitist?) behavior that makes it so much easier for me to communicate in written words. more likely, pages of a book aren't able to criticize or judge. rather, the paper is happy to soak up the ink (and, in my case, the tears) and be filled. feeling a bit cranky today. is it pms? is it the shifting weather? is it overeating yesterday? is it mom's current manipulation du jour? is it questioning my sanity of pursuing my art? all of the above...and yet, i'm convinced there is some rotting root that ties them all together. i'll have to be careful not to cut my fingers on the chards of glass that i'm going to put together with red yarn today. nothing else seems to inspire me at the moment.